“Comparison is the thief of joy.”
My friend, Stacey, quoted that to me years ago when we were talking about one thing or another. I don’t recall the conversation now, we’ve had countless ones throughout the years, but that quote stood out to me as a deep hitting truth.
And throughout the years I’ve seen it ring true in so many lives – and I’ve seen lack of heeding of that wisdom destroy so many more. Both individual lives and entire homes are destroyed daily with this as the root cause, the poison that starts out small and spreads at a devastating and merciless pace.
Why do we compare? We sit in our homes, with our family we have built, perhaps our career we worked so hard for, so many of the things in our lives being things we once hoped and prayed for but now that they are attained our attention span is that of a spoiled child to their toys a week after Christmas.
We look around and see that what everyone else has…and we question what we have as a result.
Instead of appreciating, we question. We wonder if this was truly what we wanted and if so, were we aiming high enough? Rather than seeing the blessing of what we have, we begin to think that perhaps our hearts desire was focused on the low hanging fruit – forgetting the sweetness and nourishment that we’ve received from it.
We see bigger things, prettier things, the facade of other homes and the facade of families that appear happier than ours, not that we are paying much attention to ours at this point anyway. We see the green grass of other lawns and before we know it our own grass withers with neglect as our imagination waters those lawns instead. And when we turn back, we see the dried up grass and don’t consider that we’ve played a big role in that.
Comparison is the thief of joy.
What then, is the bringer of joy?
Gratitude.
I’ve seen many a life, long thought to be gone, bud and burn anew as the result of an awakened grateful heart. I’ve seen dull faces shine brightly again, lifeless marriages spring forth fountains of youth and vigor, and forgotten children begin to thrive – just by coming under the growing shadow of gratitude.
Comparison is the thief of joy.
And this should be conversely coupled with
The grass is greener where you water it.
Tend your own lawn. Because when you chase after other lawns, you don’t end up with them. You end up losing all.
And looking back, from a self created divide impossible to cross over, you see the place you came from and then you notice it – the green.
This morning, after I sent this column to my friend, Stacey, to read, he shared another quote that is the perfect ending:
“The struggle ends when the gratitude begins.”
